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06/25/08 |
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11/something/07
First of all, many thanks to anyone who took the time to send me an email regarding my last posting. I hadn't checked my email in a bit and was surprised to see that a few other people still check the site. It definitely helps the old mental state to hear people say nice things. So thanks Tucker, Teigen, Joe, Dave, Gabe, Ted (let's get that picture of the week going), shit, even The Badger chimed in. And thanks to anyone else I've seen that has asked me if I were suicidal. I'm not, by the way. Just stressed out. And it's getting better. Writing things down in my little public diary helps to see things clearly. It's great getting input from other people - especially people who see things the same way I do. Here's the opening to an email I got from my brother:
Nice post on your homepage, Khaki Jockey. Go iron your pants you fraud.
So enough crying about jobs (for now). I promised Me (Dave) that I would make his nose manual on a two inch box look badass so here you go. Doubles with Jamiel Jr. on the megaramp.
And I'm going to try and bring the coding for the site up to speed. Notice the extra 120 pixels in width? Wow. Bringing shit into 2004 with a bang.
So maybe it is over. Maybe my whole life is over. That wouldn't be so bad. I've pretty much done most of the things I've wanted to do. We'll see. My biggest flaw as a human is enjoying not knowing what to do. I just don't care. I like being spontanious and I'm having a hard time finding a way for that to work in an adult environment. But really, who gives a shit? And Munzie, since you'd be the only person left who may check this site, congratulations on your gig with The Mag. I was so hyped when I saw your name as a staff writer. You're great at what you do and you deserve it. Keep it up. 08/15/07 My son took a shit on me in the bathtub last night. We like taking what I call a 'shath' after dinner where I fill the tub half way and then turn on the shower as we're sitting in the tub. It's kind of like it's raining and he thinks it's funny when daddy spits water at him. but last night the water was almost full and suddenly Finn's face turned beet red and I looked down to see a rather large turd coming out of his b-hole. It was my own personal 9.11. I jumped out of the tub just as the bomb hit. When you're in a situation like that your instincts take over and I found myself gently lifting the bomb out of the tub with my bare hand before it even had a chance to break apart and do horrific damage to the rubber ducky and other toys we had in the tub with us. People throw around words like 'hero' and honestly I don't think that's a big enough word. Seriously. You try picking up someone's fresh shit with your bare hand while they stand there laughing at you. It's not easy. As for skating, Dooner and I went to what I can only describe as a worthless obstacle just down 394 from town. It's the semi-full pipe with a partial lip where Munzie does a frontside nose pivot to fakie in the Cal-Surf video. After seeing the thing I really can't believe he did that. It's crazy. We basically looked at it and knew there was no way we could skate it. Thanks for the tip, Pizza. Epicly Later'd has changed my views on a few skaters and re-enforced my views on others. It made me like Ellington and somehow dislike Greco even more. But I still watched every one of them. 08/10/07
The demos are in for the new project. It's called Traveling Trivia. My brother and I go up north quite a bit and basically got to talking about how it would be nice to have some trivia questions on a CD for a road trip. Six months later with the help of quite a few people we're rolling on the project. We've currently got three different volumes. General, Movies, and Adult and several others in the works. The adult one kind of happened as a joke but turned out by far to be the most fun to do. Lots of questions about rated R lines in movies, sex acts, dumb things celebrities do... stuff like that. The others are tame but still fun for the road. It's packaged as a post card which turned out pretty cool. If you're got a road trip planned and would like something to do check out travelingtrivia.com. If anyone knows anything about distribution, I could use some friendly knowledge.
Lord of the Lines on Saturday, July 28th. Click the image for details. Also, Backyard Ramp Jam is on August 18th. That's all I've got for now. I was supposed to have lunch with Benji today but I guess we both forgot. 06/20/07
My first broken bone? That would be my wrist. Back around 1986 or so the Shriver Brothers had a vert ramp in their back yard. My buddies and I went there and I did an early grab judo air about half way up the transition and landed funny. Funny like I fell backwards and my arm snapped & looked like a wet noodle funny. I got up screaming and running around and headed to the hospital for the first of many casts in my life. It was a pink cast by the way. So when Brian Shriver asked me if I'd help him build a ramp in his current backyard of course I was hyped. I love backyard ramps. This one is quite a bit shorter and I've got an extra 20 years of skating knowledge to help prevent any future breakage (knock on wood). The original plan of 16 feet wide was dumped once we set some of the transitions together and Brian saw what 24 feet would look like. That was all it took. It's coming together rather slowly but we're picking up the pace in the next few weeks before summer has come and gone. Should be fun. And when is the backyard ramp jam? I've been so damn busy I'm out of it. Someone let me know. If it hasn't happened yet maybe we can get this thing done and add it to the list. It's in Oakdale. 06/18/07
Warning: baby talk. It's my kid's birthday this week. Wednesday to be exact. I'm still upset that he was born on the 27th rather than the 26th. 6/26/06 would be so much better (and easier to remember) than 6/27/06. I'm kind of a freak about numbers. On the day we went to the hospital I realized the date I was all excited and they said he was coming that day (the 26th). We waited and waited and waited until they finally decided to do a c-section because his head was slamming against Heidi's pelvic bone with every contraction and he wasn't coming down. By now it's about 11 at night and they start prepping and everything. I'll spare you the details and skip ahead to Heidi strapped down to a table and cut open like a frog. I stayed with her behind a sheet and tried my best to comfort her. Then a nurse told me to stand up and look and I said I was going to stay Heidi but then he said 'I think you're going to want to see this'. I stood up and saw this doctor shoving his hands elbow deep inside my wife's stomach and suddenly this head popped out and looked right at me. I think both of our expressions were 'WHAT THE FUCK?'. They pulled him out. He cried. I took pictures. It was very surreal. And it was also 12:45 in the morning of the 27th. Oh well. Doctors work in mysterious ways. Happy birthday buddy. 06/24/07
So the other day I found myself skating down to the park. People were there but I didn't care. People would watch and I didn't care. It's strange but it makes the world a lot bigger. Then I went to a bank down under the 4th street bridge (by Target Center) and was just going to dork around but before I could even set my board down this security guard came out fully yelling at me. This hasn't happened to me in a long time. I'm just not used to being talked to like that. He was standing with his face like six inches from mine yelling about skateboarding. All I could say was that he only had to tell me once and I went on my way. What a fucking cock. I'm a 35 year old guy all by myself in an area where no one was even in sight. It reminded me why I grew up with no respect for authority. Anyway, I headed towards Washington Avenue and there was a black couple up ahead of me and they seemed to be heckling some group of girls by J.D. Hoyts. I didn't think much of it and skated on past and the woman started yelling at me. I was in no hurry so I stopped and asked what was happening. She said she wanted a ride. I set my board down in front of her and told her to feel free. The guy started laughing and egging her on. She finally said she wouldn't ride my board but she'd take a piggyback ride. Next thing I know she's on my back and I'm trying to get on my board. I stepped on and got about two feet until her weight started going forward and I couldn't hang on. Down we went. Right on that bridge on Washington Avenue. Cars were honking and the guy was laughing his ass off. I was scared that the woman landed on her face, I couldn't tell. We both got up laughing. I was bleeding from my knee and her from her elbow. We walked the rest of the way down the block laughing about the whole thing. It was pretty damn funny. None of us gave a shit what anyone around us thought. It felt like I snapped out of some old man funk. I don't care that people look at you like a criminal. I don't care about getting yelled at and I don't care what strangers think if I land on my face with a large woman on my back. It was fun.
06/12/07
06/19/07
Damn Am is over and I'm exhausted. It was a lot of fun even though I missed most of the night time parties. I was away from the family all day so after judging the contest I usually just went home. It's too hard to keep up with you kids. As you may have seen or heard, Anthony Shultz won both the bowl and street contest. I know Lucero checks this site all the time so will you just turn the kid pro already? He destroyed the entire park. Mint won best trick with the biggest switch flip I've ever seen. I'm looking for a video clip right now at the Tampa site but don't see it yet. It'll probably be there by the end of the day. Check here. One of the funniest things was on Sunday morning when Mint came over to Dooner and me at the park saying that he couldn't get a hold of Jamiel and that he was probably still sleeping. Nate asked Dooner if he'd go wake him up because Jamiel was the first skater of the semi finals and he just lived across the highway. Dooner agreed and off we went to get his ass up. We pull up, knock on the door, knock some more, ring the bell... Nothing. Then Dooner checked the back door and it was open so we went in. Dooner started just opening random doors looking for Jamiel. I could hear him saying 'Sorry Mike' and a few seconds later, 'sorry Wes', before finding out that Jamiel's room is in the basement. Down we go to find him on this crusty ass old mattress on the floor sound asleep. We woke him up and told him his run was in about 15 minutes and he just stared at us for a while with a very confused look on his face. He had no idea what was going on or why the two of us were in his bedroom. I told him later that I was going to pour water on his head but I didn't know how he'd react so I opted not to. It took him a while before he realized what was actually going on and Dooner and I took off back to the park. He showed up in time to go first although I don't know if that was such a good thing. He looked a little sleepy out there. Sure made me laugh though. And the funnier thing was as we were leaving the basement Dooner ran up the steps and fell because the shitty carpet wasn't tacked down. I saw him do it but somehow I ended up doing the exact same thing on my way up right behind him. Doon-doon got a good kick out of that. Then there was Pizza bagging on the friends of the guys we were eating dinner with but that's too long a story. Another time maybe.
06/12/07 Update time... I'm at work but I think I'm going to leave and go skating. It's 9:30 in the morning and I'm restless. I went out to that Mound park last week and was the only one there for a while. It was pretty fun to dork around on. Maybe I'll do that. I don't know what to think of Chis Haslam but his kickflip to fakie in the begining of Round 3 gives me a boner. And if any of you old peole out there (Bruce Shriver) haven't seen Cheese and Crackers yet, be sure to watch the second clip.
05/31/07 Top Shop = 3rd Lair. For the second time, 3rd takes bragging rights for the top shop team of 2007. What can I say? They killed it. Mint won best trick (Platinum staff already has video posted). Despite a nasty sinus infection it was an overall good time. Sure makes coming back to work and have to grovel to douche bags in ties suck. My highlights include judging with Vern Laird, Jason Rothmeyer and Jamie Erickson again and we added Kris Markovich to the panel this year. I've seen him skate in person but never had a chance to meet him before. Super nice guy and fun to work with. Another highlight was Danny Jensen with one of the top runs of the weekend for Familia. He was on fire. Benson's impromptu run was pretty amazing and it was great just to be out and see everyone. Sam, Jack (sorry I didn't get to meet Jet), Navarrette, lots of people I hadn't seen in a while. Lowlights include: Being sick all weekend. Double flips. Late flips. Miller flips. Back flips. Going from chip leader to busted in two hands (you're welcome, Joe), and being turned off veggie burgers forever after having three a day over the weekend. week. lets rage. we could double up on one of those hideous milfs. - A TEXT MESSAGE I GOT FROM BENJI MEYER SATURDAY NIGHT WHEN I TOLD HIM I WASN'T GOING OUT.
04/27/07 If you haven't seen it yet, our own Chris Thatcher has this months 'Canvas' section of Thrasher Magazine. Congrats to Chris. He's living the freelance life right now so anyone out there who needs graphic work done should hire him before he gets famous and too expensive for you. Speaking of famous, I stumbled upon this quote by South Park's Trey Parker: People wonder why we rip on celebrities, when all around there are pages of shit glorifying celebrities like Winona Ryder. And celebrities view themselves as the fucking Mozarts of their time. Even fucking Ray Ramono thinks he's an enlightened individual. These people all think they're enlightened artists and therefore speak for the country. But I haven't met one celebrity who wasn't a little bit fucked up. Actors and actresses are the worst, because they're just fucking monkeys. Half the people in this country could do what they do but for some reason they think their opinion matters. I made it to exactly zero of the Tre Day events. I'm in the middle of my second cold in about a month. This weekend's highlights included coughing and blowing my nose until blood come out of both, hardly sleeping because my son doesn't like to sleep, and waking up with both eyes crusted over with that crusty shit I (and most people) call 'sleep'. I wanted to have a bunch of photos from the party but I don't. Hope it was fun. Hopefully Munz went and will have some posts on plat. And special thanks to Sissi for the hook-up. Here's his hardflip interview from, I don't know, 2002? I wasn't into dating things back then. And the video clip is broken so don't bother clicking.
04/23/07
This picture of our dog Sandy was taken last summer after she escaped from the yard. She got out and ran all over the neighborhood until I finally found her in the middle of a pond - doggie paddling after Canadian geese. She got crazy when she was loose and wouldn't ever come when she was called so after a few meek attempts to outsmart her I finally threw everything that was in my pockets on the bank of the pond and went in after her. Let me tell you, ponds in north Minneapolis are fucking gross. I had new shoes on (that I threw away afterwards) and trudged my way through black, murky, god knows what and finally got her. I was late for work and a complete mess. We went home and I hosed us both off. I was pissed but Sandy had the time of her life so I couldn't stay too mad. Another time she escaped Heidi and I chased her all over hell. Then just as Heidi got kind of close to trapping her she jumped into a bunch of thick brushes towards highway 94. Next thing you know there's a loud screech followed by a crash. We figured she was toast but all she did was completely stop traffic on 94 and cause an accident. It was even on the radio. Sandy died on Saturday. Our house seems very quiet without her. She was a good girl and I miss her very much. Heidi has had her ever since the first day she bought the house we now live in. I'm glad she got to go back to her original house for a while. She was a package deal with my wife when we got married. So Sandy, if there's internet access in doggy heaven we miss you and hope your running free and the ground is littered with scraps.
04/12/07
Top Shop is 3 weeks away. Hard to believe it's the 5th year already. I've judged it every year and have always had fun doing it. It might be my favorite contest to judge. Every year a Minnesota team has won (home ice advantage) but a lot of out of towners are going to be there this year so get your game face on. If memory serves me I think Fobia won the first two, 3rd Lair won the third and I know Cal won last year although if Familia didn't enter a two year old shop contest winner they might have taken it. That's the fun of the contest though. Good times. Wasn't it 80 degrees a few days ago? How about all the weather we've been having lately? Me? I'm totally into nollies right now. Mostly because I can't do them. So I'll go cruise around my new neighborhood and just pop tiny nollies. They're starting to feel more comfortable but I step off at least half of them. All nollie sessions until I can make it down a curb. That would be the shit. I've been a fan of Big Fuckin Skulls for a few years. Not because of their music, just their name. They submitted it to the City Pages Minnesota Music Directory and I think we gave it best band name or something. Anyway, I had never heard their music until a few days ago and I'm hyped on them. Check out their myspace page So I almost quit my job last week. I was offered another job at another paper for more money but I turned it down. Reason? I never wanted to sit in front of a fucking computer for a living. At least this job lets me screw around enough to make it worth while. See, having a kid now made me think I should take this whole adult career thing more seriously. But I just couldn't do it. What good would it be to make more money and be miserable? My dad was a dick when I was a kid and would blame it on having to work for us kids. I'm not doing that. I'll probably delete this post but this is good therapy. I've felt very censored lately when in reality everything has felt fucked. My house situation, my marriage, my job, pretty much the major parts of my life are fucked up. The only thing that constantly brings me joy is my son and skating whenever I can find the time to do it. But this last weekend I was able to get my north house all empty and clean and it goes on the market today. The wife and I have been communicating better and last night my son slept better than he has in a long time which in turn gives us more decent sleep. Things seem to be getting better. Whew. How much do I owe you?
I feel like almost every part of my life is in flux right now. Lots of changes going on. I've been finding it's easier to simply go through my daily motions and not think about it but I don't think that's healthy. So grabbing my board and pushing as fast as I can along a bike path is sort of my therapy. I miss the days when all I did was skate. Munzie's New Jack article in the new Skateboard Mag sums it up pretty well. Time to shit or get off the pot. Ben Papas is dead. And it appears he killed his girlfriend. Shane Cross died in Australia last week too but when Dooner told me about Shane I wasn't even sure who he was. I had to see his picture to know for sure. That sucks and it's a tragic loss but Ben Papas effected me in a strange way. He and Tas were idols of mine for a few years there. They could do anything. Most even thought Ben was better than Tas. I guess in case anyone except Dooner ever sees this I should point out that Tas still skates contest and still rips. I've hung out with him a few times and he's a handful but a super nice guy. Just kinda scary. I hope it's not true about him killing his girlfriend but it probably is. Be careful of fame, I guess. He had it for a short time and it seemed to fuck him up pretty good. The place was pretty small. A concrete slab with cement banks and quarter pipes. Of course no one was skating so I was stoked to cruise around by myself. About three seconds after I get there three little thugged out gangsta kids come up and start heckling me. Rather than hating them all and wanting them to get hit by cars I just skated up to them and told them I wouldn't be doing a demo for them and if they wanted to hang around there they'd have to skate with me. They were all for it. The youngest was around 8 and the oldest maybe 10. They all took turns on my board and whenever I'd do anything they'd freak out. 'Damn, did you see that!!' - who knew 360 power slides were so impressive. It was pretty funny. After messing around for a while the oldest kid started asking poignant questions about skating. About the nature of pumping up and down transition, the concept of the ollie, why is frontside frontside, stuff like that. And the other two kids would gather around and listen and remember every word I said. Not only that but these three kids who had probably never stepped on a skateboard were rolling around and pushing fairly comfortably. Then the older kid got on top of the cement quarter pipe (probably 4 feet tall) and set his tail on the end like he wanted to drop in. I told him I'd give him a buck if he made it and I'd take him to the hospital if he didn't. He dropped in perfectly. I lost a buck. His two friends attacked him like he just caught the winning touchdown. They were proud. I was happy. I told them I had to get going and the smallest one called me a bitch and told me I'd be leaving my board with them and he pointed a gun at me. I said 'okay' and went home.
My brother found some old Ramp City footage that Kurt Schmidt posted on Youtube. This was the first skate park I ever went to. I learned how to drop in on this ramp. It was probably around 1985 or so. Holy fuck I'm old. Look at those boards. I know Barbo is there and I think Woody too. It's so old it's seriously hard to tell. Anyone remember Gary 'The Lump' Lumpkin trying to drop in and landing on his head? I wonder if there's footage of that. or click here for large version. When I was a kid I was a big Vikings fan. I didn't watch or know anything about the other big three (baseball, basketball or hockey). I collected football cards and would play with them like they were action figures. As I got older and started skating I lost interest in team sports and really didn't much care about anything outside of skating. Then in my 20's I started getting into basketball. It was when the Wolves first started here. We were a shitty team but it was fun to watch. I followed them all the way to the conference finals. Then I lost interest. Aside from Garnett, I find most of the players in the NBA obnoxious. I'd rather have cancer than watch Troy Hudson dribble down court one more time. And NFL players are worse. Spoiled millionaires refering to themselves in the third person and making the game unwatchable. Miami can get its roll on all it wants. I bring this up because I realized I've gone from a football/basketball fan to a baseball/hockey fan. I used to think they were both unorganized boring sports. Maybe they are. But in baseball if you start acting like a turd you're going to get pelted with a baseball. And in Hockey if you're a turd you get the fuck beaten out of you. That might be the main reason for the switch. I don't know. I was just looking at my sleeping kid and thinking about his knees. His fresh little knees. No damage. They could take years of punishment. They don't make any noise when they bend or anything. Man I wish I had his knees. Bigger though.
Weird Al kicks ass. He's still got it after all these years. I loved the movie UHF. I even saw him live at the State Fair so I'm biased but this version of White and Nerdy (parody of Ridin Dirty) is sweet. Here's the video - Thanks Bruce.
It's been a few months, eh? Nesser sent me that flyer on the right and I got super excited and figured I'd do a quick update. First thing is congratulations to Josh Holtan on getting hitched. Heidi, Finn and I were super excited to go to the wedding but as Josh may some day find out having a child makes you retarded. We forgot about the wedding. We feel really bad. I rely on Heidi to remember dates and when I told her on Saturday that we missed is she demanded that it was on the 18th. God we're dumb. Speaking of the boy, he's doing great. Still trying to kick a cold but overall he's a happy baby. His street name is Section 8. He had to get his two month shots and all the neighborhood kids thought he actually got shot. "Did you hear about Section 8? Muthafucka got shots!"
Finn's almost standing so I'm going to get him a little board & see what he can do. At this point he'd probably drool on it and shit out the back of his diaper. It's strange how last year I thought babies were gross and now I'm all corny for him. It's fun. Let's all have babies.
A message from London Luke: We've had a lot of requests for Backyard Ramp Jam shirts so were gonna fire
up the Handjob press for a second time on these jems. Contact Luke at
tame55@hotmail.com or www.whateverfeelsgood.com to get yours. Thanks a ton to Luke for the back yard ramp jam last weekend. I wasn't sure if I was going but I had to for at least a little bit. I jumped on at the first stop in Mound. I'd never been there before. It's actually a pretty cool little park. All cement with decent transitions and shitty coping. There were so many people there that I didn't really skate but after the bus left I stayed behind with Sissi, Eddie and Benji to roll around some. It was fun. Then off to Fridley to skate Jinelle's ramp. I think I spelled that wrong but maybe not. Anyway, I like that ramp a lot. It's little but fun. Everyone hanging out, skating and climbing trees. She gave me some awesome clothes for Finn. A Guns and Roses shirt and a Misfits onesie. I was going to go home but since we were close to Fred's I wanted to go for a minute. It's always fun there too. This year he added some new ramps for more chaos. Josh, Luke, Jammin' J, Chase were all killing it. Shit, everyone was killing it but the absolute best thing I saw was Jammin' J lock into a smith grind on the quarter pipe (it's about 5 feet tall) and he sketched out and tried to bail by jumping off his board but accidentally landed back on the board on his ass and rode down the tranny across the floor. So rad.
So it was a lot of fun and I cut out early to come back to the wife and boy. I missed being away from them if only for a few hours. He's my little homie. I would have a hard time describing what it's been like. It was rad to talk to Sissi because you don't really give a shit about kids until you have them. We talked about first dumps, diapers, crying, all that fun stuff. Rob helped out a lot when we were first thinking of having kids just by telling me what his life was like now. Kids always seemed like a pain in the ass but he said it only makes life better. It was also great to get congratulated by so many people. Thanks to everyone.
Mr. Perry, it seems we enjoyed the eternal struggle between the Daggers and
Val's together. It actually was on TV a few months ago and I caught it in
the middle of the "joust" scene. I, for some reason, had never seen the
movie and was bummed I missed the first half. Then, this weekend I was
flipping through the channels and again, stumbled upon Thrashin', but this
time at the very beginning. Very worth it just to hear "Beat it Val jerk"
spoken.
I guess I would be a val. Back then I was in Stillwater and I was wearing some really stupid shit. Pink shorts, the pirate cut (Tony Hawk hair), checkerboard vans, nose guards, rails and the 360 degree dome tail skid. I was a total val. I wasn't introduced to Daggers until I first came out to PISS. Those guys were agro. It was an aggressive style of skating that I'd call 'Thrashing'. I pretended to be a Dagger but I still wear pink on the inside. Fuck the Daggers. I'll joust you punks any day.
Jackson also reminded me of another funny skate movie called "Skatebaord" from 1978. Good shit. Or how about The Skateboard Kid? That reminds me of a great old music documentary called "Urgh! A Music War that I used to rent. If you like old punk you'll dig it. And if you're looking for Gleaming the Cube in IMDB you'll be happy to know you can find it under both titles - Gleaming the Cube or A Brothers Justice.
Vans Warped Tour on Sunday. I slammed so hard there last year that I still feel it. I'm not kidding. I must have fractured that little bone in your wrist. Fuckin' thing still hurts and I can't put pressure on it. Speaking of broken wrists, this is pretty funny....
I don't have much today. Thrashin' was on TV last night. It only took 20 years to make it to television. It's really not bad. It's corny but there are lots of skaters in it plus the Red Hot Chili Peppers. There are some classic lines. I remember the promo posters had the main character standing there in full pads with his wrist guards on backwards. If you want to see what street skating was like in 1986 you should check it out. If you were skating when that movie came out you're officially an old ass man. I might have to buy that shit.
Another Damn Am has come and gone. I'd like to say I partied all night and shit in a pizza box or whatever but being an old ass man I took it easy. Judging all day really takes a lot out of you. Saturday was a long fucking day. Friday night I stopped in to check out the bowl jam. Dooner was supposed to judge but he wanted to skate so I took over his duties. He did make me give him a cut of the pay which was smart because he got last place. I think I gave him a 3. He was falling just rolling across the flat. Josh Folley ripped the whole contest and won it hands down. He did one of the longest 5-0 to fakies I've ever seen from shallow to deep and front feebled around the shallow corner. Someone give that kid a board sponsor already. Some of the favorite locals fell short on Saturday. Mint and Jamiel missed the cut to 30 but Munz, Tulio, C.J., Cody, Davis and Bauman made the semis. A dude named Manny Santiago ended up winning and Cody McEntire got second. Davis ended up 3rd. The finals were really up for grabs. I think any of the top six guys could have won with one more trick in their run. Sunday was a fun day to watch. Jake Duncombe may be my favorite skater for the month of June. The best trick contest was anything on the center obstacle at the park and the crazy Australian won with a gap to back nose blunt slide. He just rips all around and has a cool ass style. It was great to see everyone. Lots of people I hadn't seen in a while. Sorry to Jackson for jinxing you again. But hey, you didn't get last. You beat Gallaher who got knocked the fuck out on a missed back smith down the rail. He hit his head so hard both my nuts jumped up into my stomach. Pick up a City Pages this week and you'll see a nice Sam McGuire pic of Munzie used for the opening of the Summer in the Cities issue. Full page. It's a cool picture. So still no child. Three weeks from today is the due date. Life as I know it is coming to an end and I'm very excited. This last weekend was a going away of sorts. Not entirely of course but I've stretched out my carefree youth to well beyond it's welcome. I don't think I'll ever be a man but I need to at least be an adult. We'll see. I'll keep you posted.
It's hotter than buffalo shit outside It's making me nuts. I'm sitting here trying to put together this god damn baby stroller and I'm getting harassed by the Cal Surf staff for not updating. We've had some fun ad-a-trick sessions the last few days. Two days in a row without repeating a trick. Good shit. I smell like an ape right now. Just got back from X-Men 3. If you liked the first two you'll like this one. I'd give it 3 out of 5 stars. If you go make sure to stay all the way through the credits. Something significant happens after the credits are done. Damn Am this weekend! Who's it going to be this year? A local boy is due. Bauman? Mint? Jamiel? Munz? Every year I tell Jackson that he's due and it jinxes him. So this year Dan's going to be horrible. I bet he gets top 5 now (fuck, I did it again).
Holy crap. I don't know who's doing the P.R. over at Familia but they're doing a good job. I picked up the Star Trib today and saw a tiny Chad Benson model up top. Then pretty much the entire front page of the 'Source' section was about Familia. So hot right now. My knees sound like Rice Krispies popping when I walk up steps or pretty much bend them at all. I don't know exactly what that means but it's been like that for the better part of my adult life. And they hurt. But I have to tell y'all that I'm back on the Flax seed oil (Omega-3 Oils) and that shit works. I've been taking it every day for the last three weeks or so and my knees feel better. Not as raw. The stuff lubricates your joints. It's kinda gross tasting but I blend it in with frozen fruit like a smoothie and it goes down easy. I used it a few years ago and it worked so well that I stopped but now I need it again and it's coming through. If you're old or your knees just hurt give it a try.
Familia in the Pi-Press. Also: Familia is having a grand opening on Friday, June 2nd with in store signings from, well, lots of people. Go check it out. Dooner's knee is still jacked. He hasn't skated in like two months and is still having problems. He's going to a sports doctor to get it checked out. It's been strange not skating with him for the last few months. It sucks. Get better. O.U.T. is this weekend. I've got a baby shower that evening but hopefully I'll be able to catch the first few rounds. I don't have much today. I did just watch the trailer for The Davinci Code and I might actually go see it. I thought the book was great. I had no idea what it was about and was not disappointed at all. It pretty much read like a screen play so it should translate easily. However, I see they're also making Atlas Shrugged into a movie and are considering Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie for the lead rolls. First of all, those two suck. Second, that book couldn't be made into a movie. It's way, way, too long. Worst adaptation of a book to film? Even Cowgirls get the Blues? Simon Birch (from A Prayer for Owen Meany)? The Grinch? I'm sure there are tons. I'll have to think about that. The best? Although the Tolkien family would disagree I'd have to say the Lord of the Rings Trilogy.
I've had flatspots for about six months now. Not to mention that I've been riding the same board for longer than that. It just doesn't occur to me to buy new stuff. From time to time free wheels come along or a deck to ride. Usually if I buy something it's to collect it, not to actually use it. But these flat spots are ridiculous. It's making my brain shake. Might be time to get a whole new set up.
Have you ever wanted your own Meyer? I had one but it reeked like gas and hardly ever worked. Get yours here.
I'm going to the Twins game tonight but will probably do a lunch session.
Top Shop Mugs
I love the spring. I've got my garden tilled and waiting to be planted, my ferns are coming up, the birds are back and I can get out of the box I've lived in for the last six months and sit outside. Lovely. We're going to stay in our house and do our best to make the neighborhood nice. Since the drug house next door has been empty it's been like a totally different place. And my whining about BFI has brought changes to their hours and clean-up system. It's still gross, but better. So if you're looking for a big brick duplex someone out there should buy the old drug house and fix it up. You could get it for a song.
Speaking of neighborhoods, I read this morning that a gay marriage ban in Minnesota may cause an exodus of homosexuals. If that happens I'm going to move to wherever they all go. What a waste of time to worry about who someone loves? What about those two cops that got drunk and slammed into parked cars and then had to be tasered? That's an actual problem that should be taken care of. Cops are beat and this state is retarded if that happens.
Strangers with Candy was one of my favorite TV shows. If you've never seen it I'd suggest using your Netflix for a few samples. I've heard that they were going to make a full length film but that was a few years ago but I just got an email saying it's on the way. David Letterman is the executive producer. Here's the site.
Skate tonight.
Now it's Tuesday morning. I talked to Josh Folley last night as he was on his way to the airport in Washington. He made it all the way to the finals and tied for sixth place! He said the park was very gnarly. Cement bowls with vert sections. That's awesome. Good job, boy.
Jason Jessee was/is an idol of mine. Like most people I hadn't heard much about him since his departure from Consolidated until the Gator movie came out. Now his own film, Pray for Me: The Jason Jessee Movie., is about to come out. Here at City Pages we get copies of all our sister papers and I noticed Jason on the cover of this weeks OC Weekly. It's an interesting article. Check it out here.
It's Jason Lee's birthday today. Be sure to roll over the picture.
Independent Truck founder Fausto Vitello died on Sunday. I think I was the last member of the Gullwing Army before making the switch to Indy's. Actually my very first pair of trucks were Indy 210s.
When I left I would have guessed those West Side guys from Florida would've won. They were killing it especially for being unfamiliar with the layout. And last years champs had good runs. I saw Cody put down two solid runs including his trademark cheering for himself during the run. I missed little Logan's run for Familia but I talked to him the next day and the kid couldn't have been more hyped. That was a cool idea.
The Badger has been busy logging footage into youtube. Here's LeRoux's part from Debunker.
Platinum is down for redesign so I better keep updating. It's Friday morning and I'm looking forward to the contest this weekend. At least the parts I get to see. I'm taking yoga birthing classes with Heidi on Sunday so I'll miss the heavy hitters. Tonight is the trivia contest and my team has won ever year so far (the last two). By my team I mean Dooner and Rothmeyer's team. Those two pretty much know everything but they need me for old random shit. I'm usually good for a few that put us over the edge. I'm predicting another win for us now that I hear we recruited Hunkle to the team.
I'm also predicting a Cal victory in Top Shop. Fobia won the first year, 3rd won last year so it's Cal's turn. Lots of other shops are coming but the locals have home park advantage so it's tough for the others to compete. I hope the dude who tried 540s in the bowl comes up from Chicago again. Mike? He tears that bowl a new hole when he rides it.
Josh Folley is in a bowl contest this weekend. I don't know much about it. I think it's in Washington. Good luck, boy.
Here are some paintings. I like painting devils at bars.
Top Shop this weekend. I know at least a few people who are jumping up and down with excitement. No Fobia this year. Familia wasn't too interested in a team but they're entering anyway with easily enough talent to walk away with it. Cal Surf made a strong push last year and has big plans to knock out the champs. I think I heard Dahlen got hurt but team manager Dooner will find a worthy replacement. Meanwhile, the evil empire 3rd Lair will be going for back to back titles on the tiny back of Cody Davis. Their team is young and only getting better. Should be interesting. This weekend also brings the first ever trade show to the cities. I hope the weather holds out. I think it's supposed to rain Friday but the rest of the weekend should be dry. I've never been to a trade show. God that's interesting. For some reason I've been bored with tranny lately. This park (not skate park) by my house just got all these new trails put in that are so smooth that when you're skating on them you can't hear anything at all. And there's an empty wading pool that's fun to skate in the spring. I'm going to be 34 this year so I think it's about time I learn to street skate. Yesterday I boardslid the baby rail just out the back door at the 3rd lair. And not the flat bar, the actual rail going down the bank. I skated out there with a couple of 10 year olds that were trying it so I figured what the hell. It only took a few tries to make. The kids were amazed until I pointed in their faces calling them a couple of homos. Sorry I missed your call Badger. Try me at work today. I'll be stuck in my chair most of the day.
Oh, and I wanted to mention Clint's Slap cover. It was one of those things where I didn't realize it was him for a few seconds. I thought the picture was sick and was looking at the way his hand was on the board and it hit me that it was him. Good interview too with lots of great photos. I'm proud of Clint. Stillwater used to be a nice little town. You should see what those idiots have done to the place. CONDOS CONDOS CONDOS. I'm so sick of condos I could puke.
New Platinum stickers. Sweetness. Jeez Munzie. I got the slash on Platinum. Correction: Benji's the slasher - sorry Munz I really just don't have much to say. I'm watching my wife get bigger and I can feel the baby kick and stuff in there now. It's pretty fun. I was asking if I could fist her so I could pat him on the head or something. She said I was gross. I just want to get to know him a little better and I'm impatient.
I went and skated outside at the park. There's a couple launch ramps/quarter pipes set against the cement wall so you can wall ride over the gap. It's a lot of fun. I tried going frontside but hyperspaced. I think I'll get it though. Speaking of the 3rd Lair I finally settled with the dentist office for knocking my tooth out. See, I got the tooth fixed and then three years later they said that my insurance wasn't going to cover the accident and that I owed them $12,000.00. It was a big pain in the ass. I told them to take the tooth back because I wasn't paying that much. One thing let to another and I ended up coughing up $4,000.00 and they ate the rest. I had some crowns done too so I didn't mind paying for them. It still sucks though. I got like three grand back from taxes so I was hyped. Bye-bye money!
I saw Bauman and Blum outside CP the other day eyeballing this spot (upper left). I hear he came back the next morning and skated it. I heard he backflip/hippie jumped it. We'll see. Speaking of Bauman I see Cal Surf is now selling online. Buy some stuff!
I started another hobby a few weeks ago. I walk around my house with a camera and take pictures of the crap blowing around on the street from the BFI Recyclery across the street. It's great to recycle and everything but keep your fucking trash inside your fucking building.
Monday again. I haven't been able to update due to a jacked firewall but luckily you didn't miss anything. I've been sick with a stomach flu and I lost the poker game on St. Patrick's Day. Something inside me said it would be a good idea to smoke weed during the game. I really should know better. This shit people smoke now is seriously like ten times more potent that the crap I smoked way back when. I took two hits, coughed for 10 minutes and don't remember anything after that. I had three phone calls the next day from people at the table to either laugh at me or ask if I was okay. One friend of mine said that I 'disintegrated' right in front of them. I actually passed out. From weed. So to all those who saw this ugly sight, I apologize. But the funny thing is I made it to the final three players being 95% in the bag.
So it's public knowledge now that Seth and Olu are kicked off Consolidated for wearing Nikes. I understand that it doesn't really fit with their 'Don't Do It' campaign but Zed and Olu are not only two of the nicest, most loyal guys you'd want to meet but also great skaters. I hope you guys get picked up soon. Who would be a good fit? Off the top of my head - Zed: Anti Hero, Black Label, Flip. Ulu: Bueno, Real, Krooked.
I got to check out the progress at Familia Skate shop. It's coming together very nicely. The sign's up and everything. Drive by and give them a honk. Be sure to get in there and get yourself something nice when they open. It ain't easy starting up a business. Our support will mean a lot to get it off the ground.
It's St. Patrick's day today. I found out recently that I'm about 5% Irish. I used to hate the Irish because of the red hair so it was very confusing. But now I'm embracing them. I got a bottle of Jameson so we'll see what happens today. I think we're playing high stakes poker tonight. If you read this and want in, call Dooner.
If you're ever thinking about killing yourself don't do it by slicing your wrist. The doctor said that it takes way too long and most people don't die. This was my little accident last night. A glass bowl that I made cracked in the sink due to hot water hitting the cold glass. It didn't break all the way though so I was looking at it and decided to just snap it in half. Bad idea. The second it broke I felt my wrist open up and blood shot everywhere. It looked like a fucking murder scene. This was at about 9 pm. Heidi was home so I had her grab my insurance card and wallet and off we went. The emergency room at North Memorial is an interesting place at night. I kept getting bumped for what I could only assume were gang reltated shootings. You'd think a guy with a cut wrist would get some attention but you'd be wrong. Eventually we got in and the doctor opened it up to take a look. It was pretty cool. I couldn't look at first but once they got the bleeding under control it was really interesting. My hand went numb so I thought I might not ever use it again but the doctor said I'd be fine. He stitched the inside first then the outside and it's good as new. Scared the piss out of me though. And a good thing about breaking my right wrist skating is that I learned how to wipe with my left hand. That came in handy this morning. I wanted to take pictures of all the blood in my kitched but when we got home from the hospital I was grossed out to find that the dog licked it all up. Gary Fucking my Head When it's cold outside I let Gary (my rabbit) come inside to warm up. Well one time he and Lopez (my cat) were in the same room and all of a sudden Gary mounted her and started pounding her. She was screaming trying to get away but Gary's pretty strong. I got them appart but never again trusted Gary to be alone with her. Well a few weeks ago I was playing with him and the horny little fucker mounted my head! I told Heidi about it but she didn't believe me so I laid on the floor like I did and had her take a clip. Now who's the liar!
Weekend Warriors is TOMORROW! You should all know the details by now but if not, click here. Benji, Luke, Munzie and countless others have been busting their nuts on this thing for what seems like about five years. I'm bringing some rotten fruit to throw in case it sucks but unfortunately I doubt I'll get to throw any. All indications are it's going to be not only a great video but a hell of a party. I'm a little torn about being a grown up now. Part of me wants to start partying early, drink all night, maybe gamble a little, run around with all my friends that'll be there, take shots, puke, and maybe light something on fire. But I'm not going to do those things. I'm going to bring Heidi and my fetus and I don't think that's exactly the kind of thing I want my kid to see (even though he's not seeing anything other than Heidi's guts at the moment). It's going to be fun for me either way but something about that venue makes it prime to get wasted. So get your asses down there and let me live vicariously through all of you.
Aside from that the thing I'm most hyped on is the extension on the kiddie spine at the slayer. I grew up skating spines but I hated that thing. It's just too small. But the new extension gives you just the boost you need. Dooner's claiming a Cab over it tonight and I'm claiming I beat him to it.
 That's my blob! Ultrasounds are really strange. This is when they let the computer kinda fill in the blanks. It looks like he has no feet but the doctors say he does. That's right, by the way, it's a he. Someone to carry on the Perry name. I was a little disappointed but having a little dude should be fun too. At least for the first few years. Hopefully some day he'll come home crying his head off with a broken arm. It would make me so proud. Now to find a name. I told Heidi if it was a boy she'd get to name it so this should be interesting. I wanted to name him Rondo after the lightly carbonated soft drink from the 80's but she didn't like that. I'll keep you posted.
This is a trip. I remember a long time ago The Beastie Boys were in town for a show at First Ave. They wanted to skate so they went to the old Skate Oasis on Lake Street. I remember being there and they skated and borrowed pads from Monty Hillman I think and then they went and played basketball at Prince's place. I left to go do something else and really haven't thought about it since. But I remember Monty - at least I think it was Monty - getting pissed because one of the guys left with his pads. So he went down to First Ave and tried to get in to get them back but the bouncers wouldn't let him in until Mike D. recognized him and gave them back. It's a very foggy memory so I may be wrong on all the details but here's footage that proved that they were here. You can even see Ian skating the vert ramp in the background. Remember Dan Cortez?
Next thing you know there were about 20 people chilling watching videos and these two black guys started fighting. It wasn't much of a fight because one of the guys was huge and the other was little. The little guy just laid there while the big guy pounded on his face until me and another guy pulled him off. I looked at the kids face and it was all fucked up. I felt bad for him and was going to help him until he started throwing candy at the back of the head of the big black guy. I then realized that's why he got his ass kicked in the first place. And just as I realize that I look down and see that I'm wearing a shirt but no pants or underwear. Then I woke up.
Speaking of Steve's, Drinking with Steve is going global. I had orders from Germany and Canada yesterday. And the country of Portugal says it's a 'Stupid American waste of time.' I think I'm going to put that on the site and credit it to the whole country. This shit is getting really funny. Here are some of the national reviews:
I was suprised to see Dolo on the cover of the Star Tribune this morning. I think he's really got a shot at becoming the next Mayor of 'Kato. Read about it here. The H-bomb and I have our first ultra-sound next week. Hopefully we'll find out if it's a boy or girl. I'm still hoping for a girl but either will be fine. It's pretty fucking boring to talk about a fetus, isn't it? My little fetus is so precious! I know no one wants to hear about it because I barely do and it's mine. Some father I'll make. I think I'm going to write a letter to the kid before I find out the sex. Then I'll hide it away and give it to him/her when it's like 18 or 21 or something. Okay, enough about the blob. My knees are killing me. I skated last night for a bit and am going again tonight but I'll have to load up on Advil. If I could do a decent bs noseblunt I'd be a happy guy. I tried them on that 1/2 foot tall kiddie ramp for a while but was denied. And the bowl seems a little too tall to learn them on. I decided we're going to build a mini ramp in Dooner's back yard this spring. It'll be just the right size. How about every poker game we play there we throw $20 from the pot into a jar. We'd have enough to build a private skatepark by June. I'm not into cartoons but got a good kick out of Mr. Fish - catch of the day.
Lots of rumblings about a new skate shop coming to town. All I can say is that it's skater owned and operated and is opening around April of this year. You'll be hearing a lot more about it in the future.
The sun has been out for a few days. When I first saw it I realized that I've been under seasonal depression for the last few weeks. Nothing major, just bored and bummed. I'm a huge winter carnival medallion hunt fan. I'm only on my third year of searching but when I was younger I found the Stillwater medallion so I've been around the hunt life forever. The St. Paul one is a fuck of a lot harder though. It's a great reason to get out of the house in the winter. Plus you could win $10,000 if you find it. And it's some of the best people watching in the world.
Weekend Warriors has a location and a date. Benji told me not to post but it's online already. Check this calendar. February 25th at the Varsity Theater.
Christmas is over! There's a lul around town between Christmas and New Year's that's actually my favorite part of the season. Friends are back and town and everything seems half-speed. First news is that Cal Surf has added underground powerhouses Anthony Hart and Dane Vaughn to their team. It seems like yesterday that Dane took Vang O.U.T. but that was over five years ago. Read Mike Munzenrider's old footage here.
 My New Year's resolution is to get myself back into shape. It's harder to burn off the fat the older you get. This photo of Carrot Top has inspired me to shave my genitals and lift weights until I look like a clown. What a fucking freak show. He actually kinda looks like Shawn White. Weekend Warriors has been posponed again but for good reason. After failed attempts at booking Triple Rock and The Entry, Benji may have a spot that would top them both. I don't want to jinx it so I'm not saying any more. If my cousin Jordy is reading this - we're still on for skating Monday. I think I'm going this Friday too. Last chance to learn new shit in '05.
Once again I'm late on updating but I swear I just got caught up from lack of sleep in Vegas. It was a blast but can really be rough on the body. Especially flying home at midnight, arriving here at 5 and being to work at 7:30. But it was fun. I made it out winning enough to pay for my flight, room, and a weekend full of food and fun. It was basically a free trip. I can't say the same for anyone else. The group was myself, Dooner, Alex Moul, Jason Rothmeyer, Rob Meronek, Ryan Clements, Scotty Conley, Anthony Furlong and Kyle Berard. It was Kyle's 21st birthday and he ended up paying $1,000 for a calf-job. I may write an artile about what not to do in Vegas so I'll save that story for later. By the way Duffy is off World and back on Plan B. Kyle was bummed but it's good for the Duff.
SKUNK MAGAZINE RELEASE PARTY 
Skunk Vol. 2 release party is this Saturday, December 17th at 10pm. It's at Urban Wildlife at 327 2nd Ave. N. on the corner of 4th St. and 2nd Ave. N. No cover - 21+. Click the image to enlarge.
 Josh Folley backside tailslide into the deep end.
FAREWELL FOBIA 
I save all kinds of things. When I came home from Fobia's video premier I put this stub in a photo on my wall. I was just looking at it thinking what a crazy event that was. Atmosphere and Dillinger Four at First Ave. for the Joy & Pain release party. Only Fobia could pull that off. It was a good run. I know they're not dead or anything but I'd like to thank Dan and Joe and everyone that ever worked there through the years for everything they did for our scene. For photos and a write up of the Joy & Pain release, click here.
Well, my boys work! My wife is pregnant. I think the kid is mine. I'm not supposed to talk about it because she's only two months along and the first three months can be tricky but I feel like I'm lying when people ask me what's new and I say 'nothing'. I'm extremely excited but also kinda don't believe it's happening. There are suddenly all sorts of thoughts going through my head. What if it's retarded? Heidi's dad was a red head so what if it has red hair? How am I going to be able to afford daycare? I'm afraid to have a boy because I can't imagine trying to raise anything like me. I found out she was pregnant the same day I found out that City Pages will be sold to New Times and I could very well lose my job. All this has actually made me calmer than usual. Whatever happens happens.
What kind of father will I be? I'm 33 for shit's sake. I'm probably as grown up as I'll ever get. Can I raise a kid in north Minneapolis? I can't afford a new house right now. Do I have to get a new car because you can't put a child seat in a truck? What do they eat? Boy. There sure are a lot of questions. I was actually wondering since Benson is already going to have two maybe he could raise one more?
So yes, I'm still alive. I've just had some bigger things on my mind and have been excited to tell people about what my testicles did to Heidi's egg. I don't go out all that much anymore and that's probably good because in about 7 months I'm going to have my hands full. So this weekend I'm going to Las Vegas for Kyle Berard's 21st birthday. Dooner is flying out today and I'm meeting them tomorrow. Jason Rothmeyer blocked off some rooms at Balley's. I'm not sure who else is going but I heard Mike Fraiser, Anthony Furlong, some of the Tampa guys and maybe Mike Sinclair. Should be a blast but I really hope I come home with some money. Baby needs a new pair of everything.
So that's my news. I missed the demos and video premiers. Weekend Warriors isn't playing this month. I have been working with Luke on the new issue of Skunk Magazine that should come out this month but I'm not dating anything anymore.
So thank you to all the friends I have. Help me in hoping for a healthy child and pray that it's a girl.
HAPPY HALLOWEEN! And happy birthday Muldoon. Easiest birthday to remember. Luke ate bowl of shit at the Midwest Bowlriders contest this weekend so I made this scary Flash frame to celebrate.
Midwest Bowlriders... 
Aside from some goofy ass cartoon sponsor the contest was sick. My two favorite tricks were Mikey lapping back smiths all the way around the tight corners and Road Kill with an alley-oop frontside nosepick layback grind? I don't know how else to describe it. And it was from shallow to deep by the way. He also transferred from the street course to the shallow end and almost did it into the deep end during best trick. Click here to see his last attempt.
Josh Folley won best trick. They set that huge fan on the lip (it's a good three feet tall) and Josh did a judo blunt on it. A hundred and some odd dollars. He threw it out of the sunroof in his BMW on the way home.
Ya'll know Dana Ross, right? Well the PHP have put together a video of their own. The PHP Video Premiere will be on Sunday, Nov. 6 from 6:00pm at Brine's 3rd Floor Restaurant at 219 South Main St., Stillwater, MN.Ê Be there. Speaking of Stillsville, Clint Peterson was just in town. Sorry I missed you, kid. I didn't get your message until today.
The DMC blew his knee out at the 3rd Lair. I think he was doing a frontside 5-0 in the tight corner of the indoor bowl and just jumped off his board and when he planted his foot he hyper extended his knee and tore his ACL. No insurance and no money make Darren a sad boy. He's trying to hook it up. Wish him the best on his recovery.
In the who gives a shit file we have a ghetto update. Along with two shootings within a block of my house, two neighbors right next to me had their houses broken in to. The streetlight that has been out for four years is still out. Xcel Energy assures me it will be fixed but I've heard that same shit for years. And to top it off my crackhead neighbor's gigantic tree has split right down the middle. It hasn't fallen yet but it's just a matter of time. And when it does it's going to smash the fuck out of my house. And the funny part is that the bank forclosed on her house but they can't legally force her out until February so she doesn't give a shit if it falls or not. They say it's a civil matter between me and her. Sigh. I'm going to check the Powerball now to see if I can afford to move...
This is a picture of Josh Folley. He learned frontside blunts in the bowl. It's an old trick but it's harder than fuck to learn. I've always wanted to learn them. I ate some big ol' turds trying to do them with Josh. His looked awkward at first. He wasn't getting over the coping enough. Then something must have clicked because he did one perfectly. So in his excitement he tried to do a blunt kickflip fakie. It flipped pretty good so he kept trying. He was slamming one time after another. I bet him $20 on one more try. He slammed. So I bet him again. And again. Pretty soon the little bastard made one. Then another. And another.
So I used my little video camera on my still camera to capture the moment. Needless to say I ain't Benji. I don't know how to edit video. I tried learning how but I just don't have time. The problem here is that I was holding the camera vertically so the video is sideways. So if you really want to see this video just turn your monitor 90 degrees clockwise and it'll look right. CLICK HERE FOR FUCKED UP VIDEO.
ROOTS BEST TRICK CONTEST 
On Friday, November 11th, Roots Skateboards is holding a best trick contest at the 3rd Lair from 9pm to Midnight. It's FREE to enter. Three different obstacles and each one will have a winner taking home $250. Plus much Roots proddy tossed throughout the evening. You know how you lay in bed thinking about that banger no one has ever seen? The one you could stomp if you ever really, really tried? Time to shine, pussy.
A BENJI MEYER JOINT 
My friend Steve always gave great Christmas gifts. He's kinda strange. Well about 10 years ago he had an idea to film himself drinking on his couch and give it to his friends so they wouldn't have to drink alone. I thought it was a great idea and many years later it's up and running. Thanks to Benji for the DVD help and Becca at the Onion for some creative guidance. Makes a great Christmas gift!
It's tough being married. I've always been selfish about my privacy so sharing your life with another person can sometimes be difficult. Last night we went to Major's to watch the Wild home opener. Heidi likes hockey a lot and I've kinda gotten into it because of her. I also knew there was a contest at the 3rd Lair so skaters were bound to show up. Well some time around the 2nd period I got all defensive about something totally stupid with the wife. I was being a dick and I knew it but somehow I felt like everything coming out of my mouth was making the situation worse. Well, eventually some people start showing up. Dooner, Munz, Nesser, Josh (for a second before he got kicked out), Fred, Muller, London, etc. I hadn't seen Luke in a while so it was good to see him. And I got to catch up with Nesser who has been all over the world lately. As Steve and I are sitting there chatting I notice that the game is over and Heidi is just sitting there looking into space. The selfish me wanted to stay there, get drunk and hang out with the fellas. But that wasn't going to fly. Especially because I was such a spaz earlier in the day. So I had to say goodbye and go home at 9:45. On the way to the car Heidi was saying I should update the site. I thought for a second that part of the reason I haven't updated is because I feel censored. She's a huge part of my life and I love her very much but I shy away from writing what I've been up to because it usually involves her. I dont' think she'd appreciate me writing about her. But to be honest she's probably the only one that would check to see if I've updated anyway. I do love being married but I'm 33 years old and breaking old habits is difficult. But I'm trying my best. This morning we woke up and she kissed me on her way to work like she does every day and I was feeling incredibly lucky. I wouldn't trade it for the world.
Weekend Warriors has a premier date. 12.03.05. A little birdie told me that it was going to be at the Triple Rock but don't quote me on that. The same little birdie also smashed his laptop in a fit of rage when it didn't boot up fast enough for him. I really don't have anything to say, I just saw some shit on Platinum so, you know. My foot is still not good enough to skate on so I don't have anything to say. Since I lost my shoes I've been wearing the Tony Hawk Adios that I got for judging Damn Am. They're read and black and I look like a fucking retard. Dooner took one look at me and started laughing. He said 'There are a lot of people who could pull those off... just not you.' Dooner then went to the casino and made $700. Maybe they're good luck!
9/12/05 - Well, I survived. Sorry Josh. I should say I barely survived. The trip was amazing. Not that anyone gives a shit but I'll probably post some pics and stuff when I have a moment. The highlight was not only seeing lots of humpback whales but getting to swim with them. It was awesome. The lowlight was bringing home an infection in my foot that the doctor called 'life threatening'. I've never had a doctor say that before. See, I lost my brand new Kosten shoes in a taxi when I was there so I was forced to wear flip-flops. I got a blister between my toes and that was that. It really didn't hurt or anything until I was home for a few days and then it just got crazy painful. I sat up all night on Wednesday night fighting off the pain until I could get to the doctor in the morning. When I finally got there my foot was swollen up and pounding. The doctor quickly shot novocaine into my foot and then took a scalpel and cut between my toes and down my foot. It was full of puss and black stuff. I had to keep the cut open for five days to let it drain. He said if I was older I probably would've lost my foot. It feels okay now but I'm on these huge antibiotics that make me pretty sick. Anyone ever had a life threatening injury from flip-flops before? How fucking stupid is that? Jesus.
Captain's log. Stardate August 17th. It's been a busy few weeks. I'm leaving tomorrow for the South Pacific. My wife and I are going to Tonga to try and see humpback whales. It's our first anniversary and we never really took a honeymoon. She's always wanted to see a whale and this is where they stay and have their young. Tonga is a small island group down toward New Zealand. It's a long flight and I can't wait. It's a poor island and rather difficult to get to but that should ad to the fun. It's the first time in my life that I purposely haven't skated for fear of getting hurt. I thought I broke my wrist at the Warp Tour and after the amount of time, effort and money spent on this trip I would be awfully pissed if I had a cast on. I went to Hawaii once with a cast. It sucked with every letter of the word.
Anyway, I'm super excited and can't wait to go. I'll be back in two weeks and skating a lot and updating the site and everything. I doubt anyone skateboards in Tonga but we'll see. You never know. There have been a lot of plane crashes lately so just in case we don't make it I take this opportunity to thank everyone I've ever skated with. It's been a great run. I have no regrets. Josh Folley gets my deck collection and everything else goes to my nephews Earl and Carl Perry.
Now I'm off to explore strange lands. Peace.
The Midwest Melee is coming up in August. Jesus, it's already almost August? This summer has gone by wayyyy to fast. And it's hot as fuck outside right now. I've got no AC so sleeping's a bitch. The Boom Boom Skittle Jam is tonight. I'm going but only because Heidi wants to see it. She's got a 'thing' for Matt Hoffman. At least it will be air conditioned in there. And if you were wondering I never made frontside flips. I could get them 90 degrees but that's it. I tried lying about it but it didn't work. A quick shout out to Elijah - hang in there. Chicks dig guys with broken noses.
Ramp Jam's done. Drift your eyes right to read about it. I'm just in to clear the pics off my camera and then I'm going outside to try and learn frontside flips. Am I too old to learn them? Probably. I go retarded when I try them. I can't even get 2 degrees let alone 180. I tried getting my wife to exchange sexual favors if I learn them but she wouldn't bite. She probably knows I'd lie about making it anyway. I'm off to Philly in the morning. I'll try and get some pics.
This Platinum video is rad. It's under the heading These bums are getting more footage then you!
Duluth Contest -  Damage Skateshop is throwing a mini ramp contest on July 23rd at the Midtown Plaza in Duluth at 2pm. Lots of prizes, barbeque, beer, and an after party at Pizza Luce to celebrate Jack's 29th birthday. Call Damage for details at 218-724-4027 or click on the flyer above for the big version.
London Luke's Backyard Ramp Jam is this Saturday. I'm excited. I don't know how he did it but having it sponsored by Pabst is pretty rad. That's a recipe for dehydration if I've ever heard one. It'll be nice to get on the bus and be driven around too. He said he's got German waitresses in skimpy clothes that will serve us all day too. I don't have a whole lot else to report. I got obsessed with frontside blunts so I went in the kiddy room at the park and tried them over and over. I've done a few but for some reason I can't figure it out. Lots of old dudes have that trick on lock so why can't I? Clint Peterson is back in town for a spell after a southwest tour with Osiris. All's well with the Stillwater blonde. I'm still trying to hunt down my camera. I talked to Josh today and hope to pick it up tomorrow. I'm heading to Philly on Monday for the street portion of the Gravity Games. I think it's at FDR which should be fun as hell to watch. You're going to get a fresh top three that's for sure. If T-N-T's there or Kyle Berard I'm claiming they're one and two.
Happy 4th of July everyone. I'm sure most of you have heard but our friend Freight Train was shot recently while serving our country in Iraq. He's the only person I know over there and I feel horrible about what happened to him. He was shot in the pelvis and the bullet also hit both lungs, two vertebrae and some other stuff. He was flown to Germany and eventually to Washington D.C. If not for the quick action of his fellow troops he wouldn't be here. A medic was on site when he got hit and they got him out right away. He wasn't breathing or anything. His pelvis is a mess but he's got feeling in his feet and hands which is a great sign. Jeremy is a tough dude but he's got a lot of healing to do. Stay strong. It's 9 in the morning and beautiful outside. I'm down in the warehouse district doing this update and the city is totally empty. I'm going to have to go street skate a bit after I write this. It's like a huge skatepark out there. No parents, flyers, wristbands, helmets or shitty music. I'm going to see if I can remember how to ollie. Dooner and I just got back from judging the Gravity Games vert contest at Woodward skatepark. I'd never been there before. Pennsylvania is a beautiful state and that camp is crazy. It was a very short trip but we got to skate it for a while the morning of the contest. Highlights of the event were Bucky Lasek winning both the contest and best trick (switch kickflip mute 360). I'd have to say his winning run was the best I've ever seen live. Andy Mac got second and Sandro Dias got third. In one of his runs he bailed a trick so he grabbed his board, ran up the transition, jumped back on his board and did a 540 melon on the other wall. It was retarded. There was a setback roll-in on the ramp and during his second run Bob Burnquist was too close to the edge of the gap and tried a slob gay twist and slid off the edge. He sliced his shin to hell and slammed pretty much on his chest on the flat without hitting transition. He laid there screaming for quite a while. It looked like a compound fracture but I think it was just a gnarly cut. I'm still not sure what happened to him. My personal highlight was meeting and judging with Christian Hosoi. He's pretty short. He was such a huge personality back in the day I figured he'd be 7 feet tall but it's more like 5 or something. He's super humble and really nice. Dooner and I had his Krooked Gest board so we brought them out for him to sign. He wrote a little Jesus rant but that's okay. He's Holmes so he can pretty much do what he wants. Dooner's going to hit it with White Out so it just says his name. I'm leaving mine. Here's a shot Dooner took with his phone. I left my camera at the Northwoods Holten Hideoout so I got no pics. 
Roots has added another demo to their summer bundle this Saturday, June 25th from 2 to 4 at the Front St. Skatepark. It's at 485 Stinson in St. Paul. Click the image below for the full flier  The Duluth demo was a good time. I went up real early and watched the marathon runners. At first I was thinking that running seemed pretty dumb and I didn't know what I was doing there. But after a while I kinda got into watching these people. Some would cramp up and you'd cheer them on and they keep going. Others were throwing up and shitting themselves just to make it to the finish line. I still don't understand but I can appreciate pushing yourself that hard. My cell was dead and I was lost in Duluth so I gave up on finding the demo. Just then I came to a 4 way stop downtown and saw this guy eat shit on the sidewalk. I wanted to make sure he was okay so as I got closer I noticed he was just wasted. Then suddenly I hear a voice say 'did you see that guy just eat shit?' - it was Benji with Jackson and Dolo in his car. I didn't mean to laugh at the guy but it was pretty funny. So Benji drives over towards him and Dolo started yelling 'ON YOUR FEET, SOLDER!' and they guy was yelling back at them. It was a pretty funny scene. So I followed Benji to the demo and took a few random pics. I don't have time to make a new page so I'll throw them here:
DVS Premier...
was last night and it rocked. We went to the Independent and they had no idea we were coming but lucky for us they moved a party and gave us the side room to peep the new vid. Daewan's part was ridiculous. If you weren't there you missed out. Plus I came up about $40 rolling dice. Thanks to Munz, Dooner, Josh and anyone else in the game.
I'm heading up to Duluth to cheer on my cousin who's running in Grandma's marathon and to check out the Roots demo. It's a quick drive to Duluth so ya'll should head on up and do the same.
Damn Am is here. The bowl contest is going to be tonight (Friday, June 10th around 7pm) at the indoor bowl at 3rd lair. There are 130 skaters in the street contest so that's going to eat up a ton of time Saturday and Sunday which is why the bowl contest is tonight. Get your fat ass down there and either enter or cheer on the tranny monkeys.
This is going to be a busy month folks. We've got the Damn Am coming up this weekend at the 3rd Lair, The Roots demo the following weekend in Duluth, Doc Watson is playing the following weekend in Ashland Wisconsin and the Gravity Games are the weekend after that. I'm working the contest in some copacity but I'm not sure what that is. I was going to judge but they have too many so I think I'll be tabulating scores or something. We'll see. Hosoi is one of the judges so that should be pretty interesting. He's the shit. I hope I get to see him skate a little. The contest is at Woodward this year. I've never been there either so golly there's a lot to look forward to.
I've been doing this site for five years now. That's kind of a long time. I was looking back at some old articles and photos and thinking about how often I used to update the site. For a while I'd update it like three times a week with lots of bios and crap. Here's a link to some cute photos that really aren't that old but everyone seems to look a bit younger in them.
Old photos
This rain blows. It's been raining for a month. It makes the workday a lot easier but it still sucks balls. I'm heading up to the BWCA for the long weekend and I hope to hell is not raining up there. If you've never been to the boundary waters I highly suggest going. I'm not a big camper or anything but it's amazing up there. During our last visit we were in a canoe that came about 10 feet from a gigantic bull moose that was feeding in the water. I was scared to death but it was really, really cool. Dan Jackson is heading up too but on the other side of the park. We chatted about how it would be fun to go up with a group of skaters. It would be funny, that's for sure.
A group of us went out skating the private park and we were chatting about gays and rainbows and stuff and Luke started going off about how he loves rainbows and doesn't care what they stand for. Suddenly a double rainbow popped out of the sky like a limp penis. Needless to say Luke was hyped. A-Plus snapped a photo to capture the moment.
Did you know that the Hawaiian islands were originally named the Sandwich islands after the Earl of Sandwich who was most famous for asking for a piece of meat between two slices of bread? They were named by Captain Cook who was greeted at the island as a God and later killed by the natives with a dagger he had given them days earlier. And did you know Star Trek's Captain James Kirk is based on Captain Cook? It's true. Okay, so you learned something today. Now go skate.
New 3rd Lair Ramp
I stopped by the park over lunch to see how the ramp is coming along. Woody, Nate and Jay are jammin' on it. One end is pretty much done and the other will be done soon. The bowled ends are higher to get more speed around the corners. Take a peep.
Fuck Yeah! This lame dude has some shitty song and video that someone swapped out with 'America, Fuck Yeah!' 
Gary So Heidi had an impluse buy a few months ago at the pet store. Next thing you know we've got a rabbit to go with the cat, dog, snake and fish. His name is Gary. I know Carnie's cat's name is Gary but it really doesn't have anything to do with him. Our Gary also likes to be called 'Puff Daddy' but just call him 'Buck Tooth'. He's really fuckin' funny. I make all the animals play together. Gary likes to sleep in his own shit. 
I'm a grown man and still use words like gay and retarded pretty freely. I mean no offense but that doesn't really matter. It's still offensive. I could care less if you're gay. It's irrelevant. I have many close gay friends and their sexual preference has never had anything to do with our relationship. I try to be a little more responsible when using certain words. Several people were offended that I used the word 'gay' to describe the yard work I've been doing. It didn't occur to me that someone might be offended. I really meant it in a good way. I know not all gay people have waterfalls. That's a stereotype. Maybe I've been watching too much South Park. Now that I think of it that picture of the naked girls skating is probably offensive too. Jesus. This sucks. I'm a skateboarder. I'm juvenile. I'm sure I'll be juvenile for the rest of my life. I know several retarded people but I'm not 'friends' with them. That word is offensive too I think. Is it? I guess if you're describing something that's backwards or whatever then it would be. Hell, I don't know. I just wanted to update the site. Anyway, no real new updates today. I did, however, see in the paper that they're planning on rejuvenating Lake street. Remember way back when 3rd Lair, Cannon's, and The Oasis lived at 1201 Lake St.? Well that part of town may look drastically different. The building that the old park was in was in fact partly owned by Mark Muller. When the park moved to Golden Valley Mark made an agreement with his two partners that he would forfeit his ownership in the building for ownership of the skatepark name, equipment, etc. It was a very risky move but one that has worked out very well for Mark. But that building on Lake was pretty damn big. Now if they renovate the area its value could go up a lot. It'll be interesting to see what happens up here. Read the Star Tribune story here. Why haven't you updated your site? Here's the kitchen. It was pretty shitty. I live in a neighborhood that isn't all that great so I probably should stop working on the house but I really like to do it. A guy was shot and killed a block from our house a bit ago. He worked at a gas station. He was a nice guy. Anyway, here are some pictures. Interest rates are still low so go buy a house in north Minneapolis and fix it up. It's fun. These are a sequence (duh).
It's update time! And You probably won't believe me but I was half way done updating when I checked Platinum to see if he used a Shatner link I sent him when I saw the blurb about the lack of new content here at hardflip. So to get back on track I've decided to base this update on what I've been doing for the last four or five months. Besides rebuilding our kitchen and back yard and getting another pet and another nephew, I've also been enjoying being married. I think we're still getting used to each other. Being single for as long as I was made the transition a little strange. Trying to manage work, marriage, skateboarding and all the other crap I do can get to be a little much. So I had to back off of a few things (like updating?) until I was used to my new life. I think I'm almost there. Heidi completely encourages my skating as well as any other whim I go off on so I feel unbelievably lucky to have someone like her. I know full well what kind of a fuck up I can be.
So anyway, what the hell has been going on? Fobia's closing shops? Iota's gone? Roots is back? CJ Tambornino and Tony Lanners ride for Cal now? Jesus. I guess change is good. From what I hear Fobia is consolidating everything at their downtown location and are doing well so don't worry about them going away - they're just one shop now. And 3rd Lair has been doing so well there is talk of opening up another park or two. I'd love to see a vert ramp somewhere. Is that too much to ask?
Speaking of 3rd Lair I should mention that they won the 'Top Shop' contest. Muller was so excited that he was jumping around like a monkey. it was pretty damn funny. Fobia has owned that contest for the last few years but not this year. The young bucks took over.
I just got this press release about Lords of Dogtown doing a nation wide contest. They're coming here and everything! The winner gets a 50" Sony Wega Plasma HiDef Television! But the bad news is the opening line to the national press release: Following the success of the nationwide dance contest for the 2004 surprise hit You Got Served, amateur athletes will once again have a chance to compete on national television. And the judges will be from 93x. Read all about it here.
I saw Ed Templeton speak at the Walker last night. It was very entertaining. He showed slides of his artwork as people yelled out questions for him to answer. I've never met him before so it was cool to see him chat. I've been trying to get a piece of his art for years. I've got Gonz and Blender but I really want one of Eds. His message basically was that your ship will never come in if you don't first send the ship out (or something like that).
Ever get drunk? Well here's a little game for you. Click start and then hold the mouse button down and try to help this drunk German keep his balance and get home.
Every once in a while Charlie Wilkens sends random pictures. This one came in a while ago: 
Local beloved skateboarder Bill Morgan is up and moving to Portland. But don't be sad, you'll always have a floor to crash on when you go skate Burnside. But as Bill moves away old local Ted Dahmen has moved home from Spain. On Friday, Feb. 25th there's s going away jam at the 3rd Lair for Bill including an after party somewhere. Ask Bill or Glen when you get there. This Sunday, Feb 27th, Cal Surf premiers the new Blind video What if? at The Independent at Calhoun Square. 8pm - all ages.
By now you've probably heard that Nesser made the cover of Slap Magazine. It's a sweet photo of a frontside flip. He's got an interview too. I need to go pick it up so I don't have the image yet but platinum's got it.
Muldoon has a gambling problem. I wasn't sure, but when he was yelling at this 15 year old kid and telling him he was going to punch him in the face if he didn't keep rolling with him I decided he had a problem. The problem that night was the kid schooled him. This photo was a roll for a c-note that kept Dooner in the game. Guess who won.
Munzie has a new girlfriend.
Nice winter storm, eh? I loved it. Shoveling's no fun but it's nice to have the trash in the city covered with nice white snow. It's very peaceful. But when the 4 wheel drive in your truck decides to go out during a snow emergency that peaceful feeling quickly turns to blinding rage. Punch a few things until once again you see the beauty in the falling snow. Then clean your car by throwing your garbage in the street. Justin (Lynch) was feeling a little bad about the negativity floating around so he wanted to write something postitive. Sounded like a good idea. Usually I'll proof read articles and make corrections but I just don't have time. I'm letting it fly. Click here to read Justin remembering skating with Dave LeRoux.
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Ryan Damien is now riding for Cal too so Elijah has a playmate. There are also some whispers as to what the 3rd Lair are planning on for Summer 2005. I'll type more when I know more...
Justin went a little batshit over the Thrasher thing. I guess he called Phelps and yelled at his answering machine. He called me and was pretty animated about the fact that his kid skates now and what he's supposed to tell him about it. He said he just wanted to be left alone and talked to me about how it was bad enough to end his career and watch the guys he skated with still riding and making money and he's still seen as a villain. Justin wanted to write a response so I said what the hell. Read it here.
I got to skate for the first time in about three weeks. The leg feels okay but not great. Felt good to ride around though and the bruise is almost all gone. There's just a crater where it used to be. It was Friday night and Eddie was doing some huge fakie flips over the center box at the 3rd Lair so I was going to take a picture but he left too quickly. That kid rips.
Lasting impression 
I finally got the new Thrasher and there's a blurb about Justin Lynch. I was thinking about that interview and I didn't remember him shit talking Cab. I thought he was just saying he was suprised that he beat 'guys like Cab' because Cab was so huge.
HAPPY 2005! Hope you all made it through alive. Turns out that I didn't invent Solstivus after all. I thought I did but it turns out several people had already came up with the same concept! I'm really very happy about this. I think we're on the verge of a new holiday here folks. Thanks to Andy for the info. Have I told you that I shouldn't drink champaign? Well I shouldn't. This New Years I simply stayed home with the wife. I had a few beers during the day while I worked in the kitchen but at around 6:00pm I put the tools down and had a nice dinner wi |
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